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Single Woman’s Bliss

My hips love to walk slowly as if they are making love with the earth in every step.  This to me is one of the secret magical things about being a woman that I imagine must befuddle the common man, which is to say most men.  All I need to do to feel orgasmic bliss is this.  A slow walk with the wind licking my skin and I am flowing with the juices of life dripping out of me.  A man will see me walking in my own bliss and think it’s sexy, because I am alive and letting life pulse up from the earth into my yoni an down from the heavens into my heart.

Union with God is indeed a sensual and very delicious experience.  It is sexually enticing, however, the woman who knows the passion of the divine within, has no need or interest in her effect on men sexually.  It’s far beyond that.  There is a huge misconception amongst many men, that women dress, act, dance, and respond to life primarily for the purpose of being sexy or attractive to men.  Only a few men seem to grasp the bigger truth here, and perhaps not even enough women.

An awakened woman is sexy because she derives pleasure and joy from herself fully.  The anatomy of a woman is far more receptive to divine energy flowing inward and in a much more amplified volume than what the anatomy of a male body allows.  The channels are naturally much more open. It’s just simple physical anatomy.  Because of this, a woman is more in touch naturally with the energetics of life and Planet earth.  She can receive, if open and awakened, a constant current of energy from her environment.  A woman is sexy by nature not to please a man, but because it feels so damn good to swish the hips and roll the bliss, and women love to feel good.

My friend, Ishmael, here walks with me often and I just love walking with him.  Sometimes I think he feels what I feel in this way.  Maybe not too many men do, but I think in the Caribbean there are more men that understand this than in the United States.  They dance, for one thing, which says a lot.  A man who can dance has a lot going for him and automatically invites more opportunity to tap into the Divine essence of life.

My body is ripe for a lover, but feeling as good as I have been lately without one, just making love with the Divine again and cultivating my sensuality and my love affair with the wind is satisfying me fully for now.  The trouble with men is their resistance.  They are always scared it seems.  Scared to surrender themselves to the very thing they actually desire the most, which is the love and devotion of one good woman.  I spent nearly a decade with a man who I thought had that courage only to discover that he too was just a scared little boy.  Scared to be together, and scared even more to be alone, when I left him to give him the space he said he needed to“find himself,” he lasted a whole 12 hours on his own before he latched on to the next woman who came along.  After 8 years together, it was a big blow for me and rocked me pretty hard.

Being single at mid age isn’t all bad though.  It’s nice to feel delicious and independent, to move on my own flow, to linger when I want to or not.  I’m learning to enjoy it and I’m not in any hurry to replace one man with the next. It’s never been my way.  I’ve never understood how people can relationship hop one to the next without giving themselves some time alone.  To each their own, but I’d rather give myself some time to heal and reconnect my own internal dots before jumping into what would likely just be a re-run anyway.

There are so many beautiful men on this rock.  Sexy strong bodied steamy lustful men with skin stretched over perfectly sculpted muscles, desirous eyes consuming me as I walk by and lips that not only sound good making little kissing sounds to me as is the custom here, but look like they’d taste even better.  Some of the hottest men I’ve ever seen live on this rock and they emanate sexual energy in every movement and every word they speak.  It’s like living in a constant state of heat here on this rock.  Most of them, I can tell are clueless on how to treat a woman, but they still look damn good.  Like many women, they are programmed incorrectly, and so the sad state of confusion between men and women continues.  That is one of the biggest tragedies I see in this world.  Unsatisfied women met by men who have been poorly programmed to think a woman’s job is to please her man by being sexy, when in a healthy balanced reality, an awakened sensitized man is pleased most by pleasing and taking care of the needs of a woman who, with or without him, is alive and sensually awakened just by the touch of the wind on her skin.

If it means another three year round of celibacy to wait for a lover worthy of this love, then so be it.  I will wait and happily.  Today the wind is serving me well enough.

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